My mindfulness challenge for you this week is to become fully and completely attentive to the suffering of other persons. Let me make something absolutely clear at the outset. The invitation is not that you suffer yourself. Rather, become aware and sensitive to the suffering of other persons.
Suffering can come in rather extreme packages. We are certainly all aware of the suffering of individuals who are seriously ill and in pain. Suffering can also assume milder forms. There can be many nuances of suffering in the tone of a person’s voice, in their expressions or even in the way they may hesitate or stumble over the words they speak. With each and every encounter with another individual, become fully attentive and aware of all suffering that may be evident with the other person.
Some examples may help flesh out the idea behind the challenge this week.
- You are driving in your car down the street. A person driving in their car behind you decides that they need to drive a couple of inches next to your back bumper. Look in the mirror. Examine the expression on their face. Sink in to what may be going on with the person who is on your tail. There is obviously suffering present.
- You are standing in a line waiting to pay for groceries. The person behind you is obviously very agitated. Their body is tense and contorted. They are eager to pass through the line very, very quickly. Look. Notice the expression on their face. Be attentive to what is going on with them in the present moment.
- You are sitting at the dinner table when a family member shifts into an emotional outburst. Pay close attention to their ever changing feelings as they unfold over the course of the outburst. Suffering can settle in for a spell and – all of a sudden – vanish in a flash. Obverse any indications of irritation, flashes of anger and little flares of frustration that slip out uncontrollably. Take delight in a release from the suffering which may be accompanied by a funny tale. The shifts can be shocking and the nuances flabbergasting.
- You are listening to your favorite radio show when a listener calls in to rant. Extend your assessment of suffering to people on the radio who rant. You can hear suffering in their voices.
Suffering is ever-present in every one’s life. We do not have to be licensed detectives to confront it firsthand in ourselves or others.
Be aware of what suffering looks like. How does it feel inside your body when you connect from a deep place inside of you with the suffering of another? Is there a unique sensation in your physical body that emerges? Does the suffering you encounter assume an intensity that ranges from mild to severe? Or, is the intensity even handed and reserved? Make no judgments. Simply observe. Be mindful of each and every encounter you have with a person who is suffering in the moment.
When you observe suffering – and you are likely to observe it often over the course of one day – do a quick assessment of its character, intensity and extensiveness for the individual.
Most of us (myself included!) prefer to run away from suffering. Turn that fear around this week. Become more and more sensitive and attentive to the suffering of each person you encounter. Please keep in mind – as I said at the outset – please do not take on the suffering of others. It is not yours to have. Simply become aware of the suffering of others and leave it at that.
Robert
© Parkinsons Recovery